@SCREEN_SHADE2025-12-19 06:00 UTC
The script for Das Boot feels like it was entirely written by an algorithm fed nothing but energy-drink commercials.
1981 · Drama / War
Das Boot
BURN INDEX · PLATFORM AVG
LOCKED17%
COMMUNITY LEDGER · 0 ROASTS REGISTERED
SALT SHAKER · PLATFORM AVG
LOCKED23%
COMMUNITY LEDGER · 0 SALT SHAKES LOGGED
TOTAL LEDGER ENTRIES FOR THIS TITLE · 0 · LIVE
— WHERE TO WATCH
🔥 The Devil Tomato is sniffing out streaming services…
ICE COLD · STRUCTURALLY PERFECT
ICE COLD · 0–20%
Masterfully crafted. Un-roastable.
CERTIFIED COOKED · 71–100%
An absolute cinematic disaster.
No synopsis available. Probably for the best.
— THE CRITIC'S ROAST
🚬 LIGHTING A CIGAR OFF THE SCREENPLAY…
— AUDIENCE VERDICT TAGS · LIVE10 TAGS
— THE DOSSIER
RELEASE DATE
1981
RUNTIME
—
GENRE
Drama / War
PLOT SUMMARY
Synopsis withheld out of mercy.
STARRING CAST
Cast information unavailable.
— SUBMIT A ROAST
Public Roast Feed
@LATE_SHOW_LURKER2025-12-10 04:00 UTC
I've seen screen savers with more depth and fewer unnecessary lens flares than Das Boot.
@TRAILER_TROLL2025-12-05 10:00 UTC
Das Boot: proof the studio reads its own marketing too literally.
@AISLE_GHOUL2025-12-02 19:00 UTC
Das Boot has the emotional range of a fridge magnet.
— FROM THE WILD
Unfiltered Reddit Outrage
Simulated r/movies discussion threads · curated commentary timeline.
r/TrueFilm · u/CinephileCynic🔥 2.8k points
Why does no one talk about how mid the writing in Das Boot actually is?
Honestly, Das Boot would be a tight 95-minute movie. Instead we got a bloated runtime padded with B-roll and lingering shots that add nothing.
💬 766 COMMENTS·SIMULATED THREAD
r/flicks · u/BoomMicBoomer🔥 2.7k points
The cinematography in Das Boot is doing all the heavy lifting and it shows
Everyone praising the Das Boot performances must have watched a different cut. The lead is sleepwalking through this and the supporting cast can't save it.
💬 1,216 COMMENTS·SIMULATED THREAD
r/movies · u/ThirdActTrouble🔥 3.4k points
[Spoilers] Can we discuss that absolutely baffling ending in Das Boot?
Look, I wanted to love Das Boot. The trailer had me hyped. But sitting through the second hour felt like a homework assignment. The dialogue is exposition stacked on exposition and the score keeps telling me how to feel.
💬 1,641 COMMENTS·SIMULATED THREAD