@CREDITS_FLEE2026-01-08 21:00 UTC
Watched The Blue Planet so you don't have to. You're welcome.
2001 · Documentary / Family
The Blue Planet
BURN INDEX · PLATFORM AVG
LOCKED10%
COMMUNITY LEDGER · 0 ROASTS REGISTERED
SALT SHAKER · PLATFORM AVG
LOCKED16%
COMMUNITY LEDGER · 0 SALT SHAKES LOGGED
TOTAL LEDGER ENTRIES FOR THIS TITLE · 0 · LIVE
— WHERE TO WATCH
🔥 The Devil Tomato is sniffing out streaming services…
ICE COLD · STRUCTURALLY PERFECT
ICE COLD · 0–20%
Masterfully crafted. Un-roastable.
CERTIFIED COOKED · 71–100%
An absolute cinematic disaster.
No synopsis available. Probably for the best.
— THE CRITIC'S ROAST
🚬 LIGHTING A CIGAR OFF THE SCREENPLAY…
— AUDIENCE VERDICT TAGS · LIVE10 TAGS
— THE DOSSIER
RELEASE DATE
2001
RUNTIME
—
GENRE
Documentary / Family
PLOT SUMMARY
Synopsis withheld out of mercy.
STARRING CAST
Cast information unavailable.
— SUBMIT A ROAST
Public Roast Feed
@RATIO_RAT2026-01-19 12:00 UTC
The Blue Planet: proof the studio reads its own marketing too literally.
@REEL_DEAL2026-01-09 14:00 UTC
The Blue Planet narrates like it's being charged by the adjective.
@ROW_F_REGRET2026-01-04 09:00 UTC
The Blue Planet has the emotional range of a fridge magnet.
— FROM THE WILD
Unfiltered Reddit Outrage
Simulated r/movies discussion threads · curated commentary timeline.
r/movies · u/CinephileCynic🔥 4.2k points
[Serious Discussion] Is anyone else completely checked out by the pacing in The Blue Planet?
Just got out of The Blue Planet and I'm convinced critics are being paid in residuals. Two genuinely good scenes do not make a film. Convince me otherwise.
💬 818 COMMENTS·SIMULATED THREAD
r/TrueFilm · u/FrameByFrameFred🔥 3.2k points
Unpopular opinion: The Blue Planet is the most overrated film of the decade
Honestly, The Blue Planet would be a tight 95-minute movie. Instead we got a bloated runtime padded with B-roll and lingering shots that add nothing.
💬 749 COMMENTS·SIMULATED THREAD
r/flicks · u/ExpositionDump🔥 3.4k points
The cinematography in The Blue Planet is doing all the heavy lifting and it shows
Look, I wanted to love The Blue Planet. The trailer had me hyped. But sitting through the second hour felt like a homework assignment. The dialogue is exposition stacked on exposition and the score keeps telling me how to feel.
💬 612 COMMENTS·SIMULATED THREAD