@CREDITS_FLEE2025-12-04 23:00 UTC
If exposition were a contact sport, War Machine would be banned for life.
2026 · Action / Sci-Fi / Thriller
War Machine
BURN INDEX · PLATFORM AVG
LOCKED37%
COMMUNITY LEDGER · 0 ROASTS REGISTERED
SALT SHAKER · PLATFORM AVG
LOCKED43%
COMMUNITY LEDGER · 0 SALT SHAKES LOGGED
TOTAL LEDGER ENTRIES FOR THIS TITLE · 0 · LIVE
LUKEWARM · INOFFENSIVE
ICE COLD · 0–20%
Masterfully crafted. Un-roastable.
CERTIFIED COOKED · 71–100%
An absolute cinematic disaster.
No synopsis available. Probably for the best.
— THE CRITIC'S ROAST
🔥 CHARRING THE SCRIPT…
— AUDIENCE VERDICT TAGS · LIVE10 TAGS
— THE DOSSIER
RELEASE DATE
2026
RUNTIME
—
GENRE
Action / Sci-Fi / Thriller
PLOT SUMMARY
Synopsis withheld out of mercy.
STARRING CAST
Cast information unavailable.
— SUBMIT A ROAST
Public Roast Feed
@RATIO_RAT2025-12-03 01:00 UTC
War Machine treats "worldbuilding" the way a toddler treats a fruit bowl — enthusiastically, briefly, then forgotten.
@REEL_DEAL2025-12-16 20:00 UTC
Counted four explosions before the studio logo finished. War Machine knows its audience.
@ROW_F_REGRET2025-12-23 12:00 UTC
War Machine: where physics filed for emotional distress and lost.
— FROM THE WILD
Unfiltered Reddit Outrage
Simulated r/movies discussion threads · curated commentary timeline.
r/boxoffice · u/ScriptDoctor99🔥 1.6k points
Why does no one talk about how mid the writing in War Machine actually is?
Everyone praising the War Machine performances must have watched a different cut. The lead is sleepwalking through this and the supporting cast can't save it.
💬 849 COMMENTS·SIMULATED THREAD
r/movies · u/ContinuityKaren🔥 4.2k points
Hot Take: War Machine's third act ruined what could have been a masterpiece
Director clearly thought War Machine was deeper than it is. There's a difference between ambiguous and unfinished, and this leans hard into the second.
💬 837 COMMENTS·SIMULATED THREAD
r/movies · u/PopcornPhilosopher🔥 4.2k points
[Spoilers] Can we discuss that absolutely baffling ending in War Machine?
Look, I wanted to love War Machine. The trailer had me hyped. But sitting through the second hour felt like a homework assignment. The dialogue is exposition stacked on exposition and the score keeps telling me how to feel.
💬 294 COMMENTS·SIMULATED THREAD